From “The Hick Arrives at the Tea Party”
I, Rufus “Junior” Hickman, Jr., being of sound mind and body, do officially announce the 420 Project, a non-partisan, non-violent, all-volunteer, non-organized organization committed to serving the people of the 3rd District and fulfill their basic needs of someone to scream for them about something to someone else who should listen but has bad hearing.
Anyone can be a member of the 4.20 Project, so long as they are Republican and fear Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior, and believe that the principles and values of the 4/20 Project are things they can mostly not argue loudly against in the hopes for a better tomorrow for America.
The constitution of this non-Constitution is to protect the Constitution, even the parts we don’t like, and change this perfect document if necessary to serve the good of the country, as our Founding Fathers told us we should do so many years ago when they started amending it. We must re-found our national government that we’re pretty sure got lost and fill it with normal people who know what is actually written in the Constitution or have a pretty good guess as to what should be or probably is in it.
As the leader of the 4-20 Project, Rufus will inspire people to generally agree with things that are said, trusting they are true, because time, as our Founding Fathers said, is money. We have crops to tend to and a farm economy to placate and ain’t always got time to worry about the very specifics of relative particulars.
We must unite this country to share and believe in our principles, and do so by force if necessary, because they are good and just. We must agree that if it’s not specifically written in the Constitution or God’s Constitution, we have the right to say “fuck it,” your government intrusiveness does not apply to me and we would appreciate if you’d get your government nose the hell out of my business and your foot off my property before I blow it off — the foot, not the property, I mean.
Like one of our Founding Fathers, Gen. George MacArthur, probably said, “No man is entitled to the blessings of freedom unless he be vigilant in its preservation.” He then put his money where his mouth was and crossed the Potomac’s 38th parallel to give the blessings of freedom to the Viet Cong rather than be a slave to the government who told him to keep out. It’s time to cross our 38th parallel into the Promised Land.
The 4.2.0 Project is about principles, about being a person of principles, about having them nearby in case you need them, hopefully where you can grab them without getting up to get them, and relaying them to others who may or may not have them. And if you don’t like it, there’s the door. You’re either in or you’re out. You’re in? OK, good. Rufus is glad you came to your senses because I didn’t want to beat your ass. The following are a list of principles that we not only know exist, be we also believe in them in at least a relative sense, or better yet, we do not wholly disagree with them. And we will stand up to preserve them any chance we get:
